A man asked his of many years if she had ever been unfaithful to him. It took her a microsecond to long to answer.

"Oh my God" he exclaimed. "You've been unfaithful to me."

"Now dear, let me explain" she said.

"I, I, I wonder how many times" he stammered.

She blurted out "three" but before she could finish he shrieked "Three, three times you've been unfaithful to me."

She said "now dear, please let me explain."

He said "how do you explain infidelity."

She said "remember when we were young, we bought our first house, then you lost your job. We couldn't make the mortgage payment and the bank threatened to foreclose."

"Yes, I remember" he said.

"We would have been ruined" she said. "I went to the president of the bank. After that we never had a problem with the bank again."

"My God, you did it for us" he exclaimed. But what of the other two?"

"Well the second one was when you had those two heart attacks back to back. They said you needed a bypass operation but we were behind on the payments and the surgeon wasn't to keen on operating until we got caught up. So I went to visit the surgeon, and we didn't have any more problems and you had your bypass."

"You did it for me" he said. "You saved my life. But what of the third incident?"

"Well" she replied, "you were trying to get your health back and you took up golf. You joined the golf club and got very involved and were running for president of the club. You only needed 74 more votes ... .