In ancient Israel , it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto
himself a young wife by the name of Dot. And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long
of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.
And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy
goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?"
And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply
said, "How, dear?"
And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying
what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. And the sale can be
made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."
Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And the drums rang
out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever
having to move from his tent. To prevent neighboring countries from overhearing what the drums were
saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send Drum
Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew To The
People (HTTP).
And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung.
They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS.
And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that
no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of
Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land. And indeed did insist on drums to be made that
would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.
And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others." And Abraham
looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel , or eBay as it came to be known. He said, "We need a name that
reflects what we are."
And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators." "YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was
Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.
Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was,
soon started using Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside.. It soon became known as
God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).
That is how it all began. And that's the truth.
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