Dysfunctional Side of Hallmark
- I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love, and now
that you've come into my life...
(Inside card) - I've changed my mind.
- I must admit, you brought religion into my life...
(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you.
- As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
(Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin them for me.
- Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go...
(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably
need it again.
- Someday I hope to marry...
(Inside card) - Someone other than you.
- Happy Birthday! You look great for your age...
(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!
- When we were together, you said you'd die for me...
(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your
promise.
- We've been friends for a very long time...
(Inside card) - What do you say we stop?
- I'm so miserable without you...
(Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.
- Congratulations on your new bundle of joy....
(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father was?
- You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship
and there was only one life jacket...
(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.
- Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your
birthday...
(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep..
- Looking back over the years we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
(Inside card) - What was I thinking?
- Congratulations on your wedding day!
(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband.
- My tire was thumping
I thought it was flat.
When I looked at the tire ...
(Inside card) - I noticed your cat.
Sorry.
- How could two people as beautiful as you
(Inside card) - Have such an ugly baby?
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