As I've Matured...
I've learned that you cannot make someone
love you. All you can do is stalk them
and hope they panic and give in...
I've learned that one good turn gets most of the
blankets.
I've learned that no matter how much I
care, some people are just jackasses.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust,
and it only takes suspicion, not proof,
to destroy it.
I've learned that regardless of how hot and
steamy a relatioship is, the passion
fades and there had better be a lot of money
to take it's place!
I've learned that whatever hits the fan will
not be evenly distributed.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to
others - they are more screwed up than you think.
I've learned that depression is merely anger without
enthusiasm.
I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is
how you take it off.
I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you
think you're finished.
I've learned to not sweat the petty
things, and not pet the sweaty things.
I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep
coming back.
I've learned age is a very high price to pay for
maturity.
I've learned
that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do,
unless we are celebrities.
I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match
for natural stupidity.
I've learned that you can get by on charm for about 15
minutes.
After that you'd better have a big willy or big boobs.
I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't
working in your house, one of your kids did it.
I've learned that there is a fine line
between genius and insanity.
I've learned that the people you care most about in
life are taken from you too soon and all the less
important ones just never go away.
And the real pains
in the ass are permanent.
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